Sweet relief

I almost caved... I al.... mo..... st forgot.
But I caught myself. I caught myself feeling so helpless... again.
You cannot "make"me feel anything... very, very true.
But you can put your blinders on to anything outside of yourself and your self delusions, which in turn - "makes" me feel pain.
I thought things were different... this time.
Life has a funny way of smacking you in the face and making you get back on track.
No walking backwards... no slipping.
You poison me, entering me under the disguise of love.
We have different views on love.
That's the end of that. No more clarification needed... we love differently.
sweet is the relief of realizing this before my entire mind and heart was lost. Again.
Sayonara.